Letter Reveals Piyush Bobby Jindal’s Anguish By Francis C. Assisi and Elizabeth Pothen

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Concerned about his Sikh friend Manu (not his real name), who was struggling between his girlfriend, her religion, and his heritage, Bobby Jindal provided a candid version of his own struggles – in the form of a personal letter.

That letter, made public in the national Catholic weekly ‘America,’ formed the basis for Jindal’s 1994 article entitled “Choosing Between Church And Family: The Spiritual Journey of Converts.”

Noting that he found his friend’s situation "peculiarly similar" to his own, Jindal wrote: "Though I obviously do not have all the answers, I have experienced much of this same dilemma." Essentially the letter reveals that Jindal longed for a reconciliation between his faith and his parents, but not at the expense of his integrity or honesty. He acknowledges: “My parents are still troubled by my decision and would give anything for my conversion to Hinduism.”

But, as Jindal explains in his letter: “I approached them with questions about Hinduism while I was investigating religions; however, they paid little attention to my curiosity. I turned elsewhere, seeking friends, books and clergy of various faiths for guidance and answers. By the time I had investigated and accepted Christianity, I was no longer approaching my parents with my questions and concerns about religion."

Not yet out of High School, Jindal acknowledges that it was "a time of constant prayer and struggle" as he anticipated the ultimate confrontation with his parents. It came, rather unexpectedly, when he was recovering from a serious car accident and his mother wanted to know "which God” he had thanked for his safety.

Jindal explains: "I had resolved not to lie when faced with such direct questioning and admitted my Christian faith. I had prepared myself for the worst. I knew my parents had every right to end their financial support or kick me out of their house. I realized the consequences of my decision and was ready to face these hardships. I had decided the freedom to worship Christ was more important than the material comforts provided by my parents, including the privilege to attend Brown that fall. I even made plans to attend a local university and had arranged housing as well as a job to support myself."

But Jindal, who had secured his financial position with a generous academic merit scholarship, was not as prepared for the emotional battles. He was also careful not to lie to them. As he rightly asks: “Is any faith worth having if it motivates its adherents to deception, especially between parents and children?"

Jindal’s “search for truth” continued even though several members of the clergy advised him that in certain instances deception could be justified. But he had resolved to avoid such a tactic. Still, Jindal admits that he never completely revealed the extant of his investigations into Christianity to his parents. “This is a decision and distinction you have to make for yourself” he advises in his letter to Manu.

In Jindal’s case, after months of debate, his parents sent him to Brown where, he says, his spiritual life flourished. And following up on his promise to his high-school girl friend, Jindal began regularly attending Catholic services and seeking spiritual guidance. It was during his freshman year at Brown that Jindal decided to shed his “fundamentalistic ways” and formally convert to Catholicism. Thereafter, he taught catechism, led Bible study and prayer groups, and was active in the Providence Catholic community as well as in Campus Crusade for Christ. But, even so, Jindal would retain some of his early evangelistic ideals.

Meanwhile, says Jindal: “My parents continued trying to convince me to return to Hinduism, through intellectual and emotional appeals. They pleaded with me to delay baptism, in case I had a change of heart.” He confides to Manu thus: “It has taken years for my parents to acknowledge my Christian Catholic faith, and this has come very reluctantly.”

As Jindal reveals to his friend Manu, “I was careful to choose which battles were worth fighting- I chose a select few principles and vowed never to violate them. My parents gradually respected the fact that I did not lie about my faith, that I was willing to compromise on certain issues { I delayed my baptism and agreed to be baptized in providence}, and also that I had answers to their questions. Though they were not convinced by my responses, they were pleased that I had thought of these issues. They were especially surprised that I had investigated Hinduism and found it lacking. It was important that I had given our shared faith fair consideration.”

Equally, Jindal warns his friend Manu that parental disapproval “is something that may never change, and you must be prepared to accept this tension if you choose to join the church.”

Finally, according to Jindal, his parents were able to see certain positive aspects to his conversion. “They realized I had not joined a bizarre cult, and instead they appreciated the new honesty in my life. They considered the many evils that others choose-for example, drugs -and eventually decided Christianity was a lesser evil. This acceptance may have been aided by the Hindu philosophy of tolerance. Nevertheless, my parents never truly accepted my conversion and still see my new faith as a negative that overshadows many of my accomplishments and good characteristics.”

There was another issue that erupted within the Jindal family. “ My parents requested that I never mention my faith to my brother or try to evangelize others. I replied that I could not promise such things, but would voluntarily refrain from such activities for now to please them. I also noted that I would never lie to my brother if directly asked about my Christian faith. I reserved the right to answer question and assist those already seeking Christianity. My parents were concerned that my zeal would lead me to force them, my brother and others to accept my newfound faith. They did not want other parents to experience their pain and were afraid of losing their other son. Though I refused to violate certain principles {I was ready to move out rather than reject my Christian faith, and I insisted on a firm deadline for my baptism}, my flexibility on certain other issues convinced my parents that I truly cared for them and was trying to compromise without sacrificing my integrity.”

As he explains, “It was crucial that I attempted to please my parents in every possible way during this difficult time. I tried very hard to differentiate my religious beliefs from a general act of rebellion. One indirect consequence was that I ended a high school relationship, involving the very girl who introduced me to the love in Christianity. That relationship had meant a lot to me.”

That’s why Jindal advises his friend Manu: “You must decide which battles are worth fighting and which points you are willing to compromise. Do not make the mistake of fighting for everything with equal intensity, however. It may be more or less important to attend Mass while at home, be baptized in the next few months, read the bible in your room, meet with Christian friends or go on retreats. To this day, I still do not attend Christian retreats or otherwise contribute my patents’ money to Christian causes.”

It is a reflection of Jindal’s honesty that he is willing to admit: “I did make several mistakes, but continued trying to show my parents that I love them. My parents wanted to believe this and struggled just as hard to love me back. My parents blamed themselves for being bad parents, blamed me for being a bad son and blamed Christian evangelists. They were hurt by my decision and felt that I was rejecting them by accepting Christianity. It was crucial for me to affirm my loyalty and love for my parents.”

Finally, Jindal offers Manu this bit of advice: “I do not know where you are spiritually. I cannot promise you that becoming Catholic will be easy. You must honestly consider how much your faith means and what you are willing to lose to follow Christ. “

Jindal is of the view that, people in many cultures tend to link their ethnic identity with a certain set of religious beliefs. “Parents often feel their children are rejecting their Eastern culture when they choose Christianity. Only after years of open feuding did my parents realize my new faith had not caused me to reject them or my heritage.”

Additionally, Jindal observes: “New converts often treasure their Catholic faith because of the painful and deliberate process through which they accepted Christ. If Christianity is worth risking family and friends, it is worth practicing on a daily basis, and new converts do not anger and disappoint parents and others for an empty faith they will discard when convenient. They often appreciate what settled Christian communities take for granted. Having recently been convinced of the veracity of Christ’s and church’s claims, converts are often familiar with doctrine, Scripture and historical evidence. Given their intense dedication and current knowledge, converts can contribute much to the spiritual life of parishes and often bring others into the congregation with them.”

Jindal concludes his letter by affirming that his spiritual quest has been a rewarding journey and, “despite inevitable times of doubt, which become less frequent but never truly disappear, I have never regretted my decision.”

francisassisi@hotmail.com elsammapothen@yahoo.com