Latest Algorithm from Poet Vairamuthu

by Ramesh Mahadevan

Note: This is published with the permission of the author.

(Please note: This post is written in jest. So, if you have a fragile personality or if you are a habitual flame-thrower, skip this post. )

It has been several years since I wrote my post on An   algorithmic approach to Tamil verses. Since I wrote that  piece, I realize that I have become vastly unpopular. But  what the heck, let me go on with my frontal attack on  Mr. Vairamuthu's lyrics. It is time for me to upgrade my   earlier post ! 

Now the great Pulavar Vairamuthu has evolved a newer and  more high-tech algorithm. We have 50 Kg Taj Mahal and  patently absurd concepts like Flight-il vandha nandhavanam!  (Can somebody please explain what this means ?) Basically,  the Pulavar wants to be in the swing of things - he wants to tell us that he knows what a fax is and that  he is hip to latest cellular phones. Let it be known that  he is on top of all high-tech developments and teenage  goings on. Sticking to Pulavar's latest algorithm, I  came up with the following song: 

Song 

Internet-ilirundhu kudhitthu vandhavale
Winterstorm pola kulircchi thandhavale
Centerspread-kku sirippai thandhavale
Mentor Graphics Stock pola irangi vandhavale
(Internet...) 
Nee dhaanadi enadhu periya Y2K problem
Kaadhalaiye re-engineer seydha oru emblem
DVD devi-di,
nee Web-TV-yin aavi-di
Thitthikkindra tiramisu,
devi nee oru pudhu dhinusu
(Internet...) 
Deviyin viyarvai mazhai oru Niagara
Thevai illai enakku endrum Viagra
Taj Mahal iruppadho oru Agra
Thaamarai poo ival ennaangara
(Internet...) 

See ? It is that simple. It took me all of six minutes to  make up this song. It is only a matter of time before words  like Viagra and Y2K creep into Vairamuthu's songs. (Mark my word -  today is July the 27 th, 1998. I guarantee this before the end of this year) .

Readers, now you too can compose such lyrics. Just choose any  of the following buzzwords, phrases and newsy people and make up  anything. Have fun ! 

Technical terms: Merced chip, Nuclear fusion, parallel computing, Web page, etc.

Cultural icons: Dim sum, Spice girls, Sensex (!), Gen X, hip-hop, etc.

Newsy things: Asia crisis, Dodi Fayed, Monica Lewinsky, Ronaldo,  Leo deCaprio etc.

Vairamuthuism: Vervai, devi, janmam  etc.

(Note: Folks, please remember that the whole thing is in jest - no  serious offenses meant)


Copyright(R) Mahadevan Ramesh